What have we done?

My friends, I am devastated. I thought I had prepared myself emotionally for this, but I was wrong. I am heartbroken, depressed, hopeless. America has declared a culture war. It is rural, conservative, "Christian" versus urban, liberal, scientific. And I am on the losing side - we are outnumbered, and the trend only seems to indicate it will get worse. There is a lump in my throat when I think what this could bring.

I was raised in a strict Catholic family. Although I am no longer a practicing Catholic, and consider myself agnostic when it comes to the question of the existence of god, many of the values I learned in that environment remain with me today. I remember my favorite song in church was "They Will Know We are Christians by Our Love." Years of Catholic school, religion classes, and parental guidance taught me that being Christian meant love, tolerance, and acceptance. It meant leading by example, not shoving your beliefs down people's throats. It meant that only God has the right to judge men - "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Yet somehow these values do not seem to be shared by many, many Christians. How is it that so many people have taken such different lessons from the same Bible? How - and why - have so many taken the "thou shalt not" directives to heart, but seem to have left the overall theme by the wayside? And finally, why do they feel it is acceptable - imperative, even - that these lessons be legislated accross the board? I just don't understand.

Today I am in mourning. I mourn for the concept of a secular government. I mourn for the environment. I mourn for my gay and lesbian friends. I mourn for women's rights. *sigh* I think I need to get away from the TV and internet now, go out in the sunshine and fresh air, and just breathe.